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She was so blonde...

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  1. ...she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate”
  2. she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind
  3. ...she got stabbed in a shoot-out
  4. ...she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK"
  5. ...she thought 2Pac Shakur was a Jewish holiday
  6. ...she tried to put m&m's in alphabetical order
  7. ...she sat on the TV and watched the couch
  8. ...she sent me a fax with a stamp on it
  9. ...she tried to drown a fish
  10. ...she thought a quarterback was a refund
  11. ...she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death
  12. ...if you gave her a penny for intelligence, you'd get change back
  13. ...they had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade
  14. ...under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics"
  15. ...she tripped over a cordless phone
  16. ...she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept
  17. ...at the bottom of the application where it says "sign here".. she put "Aquarius"
  18. ...she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store
  19. ...it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes
  20. ...if she spoke her mind, she'd probably be speechless
  21. ...she studied for a blood test - and failed
  22. ...she thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center
  23. ...she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats
  24. ...she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train
  25. ...she sold the car for gas money
  26. ...when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends
  27. ...when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved
  28. ...she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican Phone Company
  29. ...when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead
  30. ...when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

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