Ralph Nader, Albert Gore and George W Bush went to a fitness spa for some fun (if you will believe Ralph Nader ever has fun) and relaxation (if you believe Al Gore ever relaxes).
After a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided to visit the men's room and found a strange-looking gent sitting at the entrance who said, "Welcome to the gentlemen's room. Be sure to check out our newest feature: a mirror which, if you look into it and say something truthful, you will be awarded a wish. Be warned, if you say something false, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void of nothingness for eternity!"
All three men, being presidential candidates, toy with danger and quickly enter set upon finding the mirror. Ralph Nader said, "I think I'm the most truthful of us three" and in an instant he was surrounded by a pile of money.
Albert Gore stepped up and said "I think I'm the most ambitious of us three" and he suddenly found the keys to a brand new Lexus in his hands, which he liked because it looked better than the VP's car.
Excited over the possibility of having his wish come true, George W Bush looked into the mirror and said, "I think --", and was promptly sucked into the mirror.
Bill Clinton, Al Gore and George W. Bush died and found themselves standing on the other side of the Jordan River, looking across at the promised land. The Archangel Michael was standing on the other side and shouted over to the three surprised Americans, "Contrary to what you have been taught, each of you will have to wade across the Jordan River."
As Michael saw their perplexed looks, he reassured them by saying, "Don't worry. You will sink only proportionally according to your sins on earth. The more you have sinned the more you will sink into the water."
The three American sages of political lore looked at one another, trying to determine who shall be the first brave soul to cross the Jordan River.
Finally George W. Bush volunteered to go first. Slowly he began to wade out into the river, and slowly the water began to get higher and higher, reaching to his waist. George began to sweat, thinking that all of his sins were coming back to haunt him. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever see the other side. Finally, after what seemed liked an eternity, he began to emerge on the river's bank.
As he ascended to the other side, he looked behind him to see which one of the other brave souls was going next. A shock of surprise registered on his face, as he saw Al Gore almost in the middle of the river and only his ankles barely touching the water. He turned to Michael and exclaimed, "I know Al Gore, Al Gore is a friend of mine, and he has sinned much, much more than that!"
Before the Archangel Michael could reply, Al Gore shouted back, "I'm standing on Clinton's shoulders!"